10 months ago, after living in apartments for 12 years, my Husband and I bought this house that we are currently living in. We love it, it's everything we wanted and all in our very first home. Here, we are beholden to no one (well, maybe the bank), we mow the lawn and rake up leaves on weekends. We got a second dog, because our first dog was terribly lonely if we went out and what the heck, I can't have kids so why not, right? We have so much love and now we have our very own home!
Well, my Husband is losing his job in January. It's okay, he has some prospects, even though no one is committing to hiring him as of yet, and he has already been turned down, twice. Our best bet right now is a job in Vermont - in fact, every day it's looking more and more likely. We have friends in Vermont not far from this potential job, who offered to put him up for as long as he needs it, which is fantastic, as I doubt we could swing rent and a mortgage.
The problem is that I would have to stay here, in CT, while he moves to VT, so that I can sell the house. I'm sure I don't need to tell y'all how hard that will be! Every house for sale in our town has been on the market for well over a year, now. We will have to live apart from each other for a long time, and we are very attached. He's starting to freak out a little and I finally am too, now.
I don't want to live without him! I have no friends or family here, they all live very far away, out of state. On top of this, I'm a narcoleptic and have fallen asleep behind the wheel, so driving to see people is out. Heck, driving to work half the time is out!
I know, I know, I'm whining, and I hate whining and generally never do it. I mean, there are folks out there who have it way worse, at least I have a house, at least I have a job - although, that's probably going to change soon, and being labeled as disabled, it's not easy finding work. I guess I'm just having a bad day.
Bugger
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Marie
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Why do you have to stay? I tried the same thing and wound up moving to be with my husband (house sold right after I made the decision to go be with my husband instead of staying with the house all alone!) Have a real estate agent stage the house and pack up the rest of the stuff and go with hubby. There is nothing you can do that the real estate agent won't be able to handle. It is not worth the misery of living apart.
Been there done that.......
Been there done that.......
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Hilary the Touched
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Poor Cissa--what a miserable prospect.
Is there any treatment for the narcolepsy? That sounds like it would make it even more difficult to be apart . . .
What are the employment options like for you in Vermont?
I really feel for you trying to sell a house right now. We've been hearing nonstop gloom-and-doom scenarios for so long, it's kinda scary . . . but I think Marie makes a good point, that--especially with two dogs--it may just be happier for everyone for you to clear out and go stay with your sweetie.
On the other hand, would he be able to do something like return on weekends? Is he weekend-distance away?
Is there any treatment for the narcolepsy? That sounds like it would make it even more difficult to be apart . . .
What are the employment options like for you in Vermont?
I really feel for you trying to sell a house right now. We've been hearing nonstop gloom-and-doom scenarios for so long, it's kinda scary . . . but I think Marie makes a good point, that--especially with two dogs--it may just be happier for everyone for you to clear out and go stay with your sweetie.
On the other hand, would he be able to do something like return on weekends? Is he weekend-distance away?
Thanks guys,
As for hiring an agent and selling from Vermont; that's how we got this place, the owner had moved to Virginia, so we know it's possible. The problem is that this house needs some work, all cosmetic at this point as we've done re-wiring and installed gas for heat. But there's enough which needs to be done still that it's really going to take someone staying behind to make it somewhat presentable. Maybe I'm pipe-dreaming, but I'd like for us to make some sort of profit on this place if we're going to have to buy a new one.
As for narcolepsy
; well, currently I am on some pretty heavy-duty meds to keep me awake and motivated enough to function at half my levels before I was diagnosed. This is basically as good as it gets, which is fine by me, I've been like this long enough now that I've accepted it and have found ways to compensate. Many patients never find ways to deal with it, so I'm good on that front. It is daunting to think about being alone and not being able to drive to the vet's if someone is suddenly sick or something. Stuff like that.
As for my job? Vermont is such a liberal state, that there are more opportunities for a naturalist to find work there than every other state in the Northeast put together! Our friend who will be putting my hubby up works at a college dedicated almost solely to Environmental Studies, so that's one thing I'm not worrying about, at least. And anyway, it isn't as though we get paid bags of cash as it is. Of course, finding someone who will look past my condition may be another story, but we'll see about that when I actually get myself up there.
Yes, we are discussing the prospect of Hubby driving down on weekends, just so that I can get some shopping done and stupid necessities like that taken care of, as well as having time together. The problem is that it is a long way for him to schlep every week, and especially in the beginning, he may have to work through most weekends. But he's adamant about driving down every Friday evening and leaving Monday morning. He's totally nuts! On that schedule, he'll be in more danger of falling asleep on the road than I am!
At least I have 2 dogs to protect me, especially since things can get a little funny around here at night. They're just hound-dogs, but they are very watchful, and one of them has already chased off someone who was trying to break into my car a few years back!
As for hiring an agent and selling from Vermont; that's how we got this place, the owner had moved to Virginia, so we know it's possible. The problem is that this house needs some work, all cosmetic at this point as we've done re-wiring and installed gas for heat. But there's enough which needs to be done still that it's really going to take someone staying behind to make it somewhat presentable. Maybe I'm pipe-dreaming, but I'd like for us to make some sort of profit on this place if we're going to have to buy a new one.
As for narcolepsy
; well, currently I am on some pretty heavy-duty meds to keep me awake and motivated enough to function at half my levels before I was diagnosed. This is basically as good as it gets, which is fine by me, I've been like this long enough now that I've accepted it and have found ways to compensate. Many patients never find ways to deal with it, so I'm good on that front. It is daunting to think about being alone and not being able to drive to the vet's if someone is suddenly sick or something. Stuff like that.As for my job? Vermont is such a liberal state, that there are more opportunities for a naturalist to find work there than every other state in the Northeast put together! Our friend who will be putting my hubby up works at a college dedicated almost solely to Environmental Studies, so that's one thing I'm not worrying about, at least. And anyway, it isn't as though we get paid bags of cash as it is. Of course, finding someone who will look past my condition may be another story, but we'll see about that when I actually get myself up there.
Yes, we are discussing the prospect of Hubby driving down on weekends, just so that I can get some shopping done and stupid necessities like that taken care of, as well as having time together. The problem is that it is a long way for him to schlep every week, and especially in the beginning, he may have to work through most weekends. But he's adamant about driving down every Friday evening and leaving Monday morning. He's totally nuts! On that schedule, he'll be in more danger of falling asleep on the road than I am!
At least I have 2 dogs to protect me, especially since things can get a little funny around here at night. They're just hound-dogs, but they are very watchful, and one of them has already chased off someone who was trying to break into my car a few years back!